Many men became great because they were married to women who helped them achieve that greatness. Their wives stood behind them, encouraged them, sacrificed and labored to bring out the best in them. They became real men. Such men have said, “Without my wife, I could not have done what I did.” Conversely, if a man loses the respect of his wife because of his own lack of virtue and striving, he also loses strength physically, emotionally, and mentally. When a man is deprived like this, his business gets worse, his social relationships suffer, and he acts like a child with his temper, tirades, and nasty deeds. Then his wife rejects him even more because she does not need another child to care for.
Most men like a woman who is either just like their mother or just the opposite of their mother. This is an automatic or mechanical response. Either they want a woman who loves and kisses them and reminds them of the complete, unconditional love their mothers gave them, or, if they hated their mother, they want someone who is just the opposite of her, who in no way resembles anything about her.
If a man marries a woman who is just like his mother, he falls into the danger of playing the child’s role. She becomes his mother, and he obeys her to the last degree. Such a man feels unfulfilled if his wife does not act like his mother. This can be destructive to the marriage because the wife, seeing that her husband is not growing, may develop resistance and resentment toward raising a child when she had thought she married a man. That wife will start doing many things to make her husband stand on his own feet. She will create many problems and difficulties for her husband until he stands up and acts like a man.